I don't know where to even begin, this past week has been CRAZY!!!!!  I guess that was a good summery of how I have felt.  This time tomorrow Patrick and I will be in Atlanta getting Matthew ready for surgery.  I can't believe it is finally here.  I am relieved and nervous, but so happy to have finally found hope for Matthew.  I still have packing to do.  I can handle vacation packing but I am lost when it comes to hospital packing.  Who knows what all will make it to Emory with me.

I have been so proud of Cheredith this week.  I can't imagine how she is feeling.  She is an amazing child and is such a great big sister.  I know that she will be be fine but I know its hard on her.  We are always together and her and I have never been apart for this long.  Patrick will be back with her Tuesday and she is staying with great friends.  I know she will be happy to have Matthew better. 

Now an update on our crazy week.  Matthew went to the dentist and did great.  He had tooth filled and one pulled.  This was his first time he had numbing medicine in his cheek.  He didn't bite his inside of his cheek, but he rubbed the outside of his cheek raw.  That's Matthew for you, keeping it interesting.

Cheredith cheered to games Thursday.  All I can  say is that it exhausted me and I was sitting on the stands.  She did great and she is really loving cheer.  CVMS has some great Cheerleaders.

Thanks to some great people Matthew had an amazing Friday night.  A friend at work made Ridgelands football coach aware of Matthew's surgery.  Coach Mariakis had the football team sign a shirt for Matthew.  After one of the football players delivered the signed shirt I thought it couldn't get better.  I was so excited, but thanks to Coach Mariakis it got much better.  He offered to let Matthew come into the locker room with the team Friday night.  I couldn't wait to tell Matthew.  I was so proud as we waited by the locker room Friday night.  As the players came off the field they stopped and talked to Matthew.  One even raised his helmet and took Matthews hand and lead him to the locker room.  Patrick went in with them and filled me in.  Matthew was treated like a star and it was great.  He had an amazing night.

Saturday we headed to Matthew's last football game for this year.  He must have been paying good attention at the football game Friday night.  He played an incredibly.  He had three touch downs and some amazing tackles.  He sure showed how much fun he had. He posed after tackles and even "Tebowed" after one touchdown.  It was great seeing him enjoy himself.

We headed to Chattanooga to enjoy a day downtown with an event at Patrick's work.  We went to the aquarium, imax and Riverboat.  It was so much fun and I am so glad to my mom came.  The kids had so much fun.  It was a great way to pass the day.

Now here we are the last day home before surgery.  I am about to start getting ready for church and then finish up on last minute things.  I want to thank all the people who have prayed and have listened to God and been a blessing to us this week.  Thank you all.  I know that all is going to ok.  It is a trying time for us even without Matthew"s condition but I have been encouraged by God's people lifting us up. 

We have to be at Emory at 7 Monday morning.  I'm not sure how long the surgery will be but I will keep everyone posted.  Thank you all . 

COUNTDOWN TO ATLANATA

We have hit the one week countdown to our long awaited surgery.  We have seen Matthew go through so much theses last three years we are so glad that this part of the journey is coming to an end.  After the surgery then we can focus on what caused the problem in the first place and help to find out what causes his stomach pain.  He is a strong kid.  He has always impressed me.

At this point all we know is that Matthew will have his sigmoid colon removed next Monday at Emory.  We had seen a surgeon in Chattanooga a few years back and the had never  preformed this surgery on a child so we knew it wasn't common, but I never expected what the surgeon said to us about it's rarity.  He said that at his office, which sees patients from all over the southeast, that he will preform 1 every 3 years.  This fact was confirmed when I spoke with the scheduling office last week.  I was informed that no one in the office is familiar with the process and that they will have to speak to the surgeon about how to prep Matthew for the surgery.  There is a chance that we will be checking into Emory on Sunday and the surgery will be on Monday.  I could care less about if the office staff knows about the procedures, I just want the surgeon to, and he does so that's enough for me. 

Now comes the difficult part.  I was terrified to see them take Cheredith away to put tubes in her ears, I can't imagine how its going to be watching them roll away Matthew to do an uncommon pediatric surgery.  Then comes recovery.  Matthew has a very difficult time waking from anesthesia, so I hope that he wakes up easy this time.  Also Matthew has never spent the night in the hospital and we will be there for around 4 days.  We manage Matthew's autism by preparing for change and by keeping a routine, two things that will be difficult in the next few weeks.  He is a fighter and I know he will do great.

Now to brag on my family.  First of all Cheredith..  She has taken a back seat to so many of these things but never complains.  Her main concern has always been for Matthew. She always ask for prayer for him and always takes good care of him.  This week at school she had a bad asthma attack and she really scared me.  I am so thankful that Patrick will be coming home to stay with her once Matthew gets settled in the hospital after his surgery.  We both want to be in both places at the same time but can't and I am so thankful he will be staying with her during this difficult time.  He is an amazing husband and dad. Cheredith will be staying with some good friends of ours will we are both down with Matthew.  I am so thankful for them. 

I am usually a planner and like everything laid out in front of me, however this will not be the case in the next few weeks.  Any one who knows out situation knows all we are going through not related to Matthew's surgery.  We are a strong family with a strong faith and we know that God will see us through this all.  Keeps us all in your thoughts and prayers and keep Matthew's surgeon in your prayers as well.  I am so ready to get these next few weeks behind us, for Matthew to have one less thing to fight through.

Back to School

Well, summer break is officially over.  Book bags are packed, lunches packed and clothes laid out.  Cheredith starts middle school so as you can imagine she is ready.  She loves school so tomorrow can't get here fast enough for her.  Matthew on the other hand routinely yells out "I hate school" when ever the topic is brought up.  Just a few hours ago he tells me that he is finally getting excited about going.  That is a huge turn from him refusing to get out of the car Thursday at school so I could run in paper work to the office. 

So much has changed since the beginning of last year.  Cheredith doesn't look at all like she did last schoolyear.  She is no longer dancing but will be cheering for Chattanooga Valley Middle School.  So proud of her for stepping out of her comfort zone.  I have seen her dance and even had the opportunity to teach her in dance but she has even surprised me.  She made All-American at camp as a 6th grader.  I can't wait to hear all about her first day of middle school.

Matthew had never played sports this time last year.  Since then he has played basketball, soccer and now football.  Sports are is life.  He loves sports so much, and of course as his mom I must say he is great.  I really enjoyed watching this past Saturday watching Matthew score a touch down. I am a very proud momma! 

This summer has been amazing.  To be able to spend days with my kids, our trip to New York, and lazy summer days it was amazing.  Even though our trips to Atlanta have been not for joy, but for doctors they have been great.  I enjoy ever minute we have had. 

As I send the kids to school in the morning and go to work myself, I am excited to see what this new school year will bring.  So much is going to change, that is part of life.  I am sure there will be lots of joy, tears and laughter.  All the things that go into growing up.  This year may be starting of a little strange with Matthew missing the second day of school for a trip to Emory to see a Neurologist and then to see the surgeon about his stomach surgery, but getting better isn't always easy.  I am thankful that we have finally found some doctors who understand and are wanting to help.  I know how blessed my life is even in the middle of mass craziness.  I have a wonderful husband who is my best friend, two amazing kids, family that listen to me and friends and a church that inspire me.  As much as I dread the routine and early hours I can't wait to see what all is to come. 

ONE CRAZY SUMMER!!!!

As I set here my days of not working and kids not going to school are quickly coming to an end.  When school let out I could not have imagined how this summer would end.  However, given how nothing goes without a catch around here I should have been more prepared.  We have went to Washington D.C., Baltimore, Maryland and New York City.  Most would agree that's a lot of travel for a few months, not my family. Ad one trip to Atlanta and at least 2 more scheduled in the next 2 weeks. Wow its been one crazy summer.

Don't get me wrong.  It has been my favorite summer by far.  I have grown alot.  Hard to believe that at 31, 2 kids and being married for almost 13 years that I still need to grow up some.  I guess with all the quality time I spent in the car I had a lot of time to think.  Seeing the kids in New York City was amazing and made me realize how amazing life is.  Any one who knows my kids now the struggles we face daily with them.  For some reason Cheredith could breath so easy while there.  No inhaler, no wheezing or tight chest.  She was able to enjoy every bit of the city and can't wait to go back.  Just the other day she told me how much she missed New York.  With Matthew being autistic I wasn't sure how the city would effect him.  He was at home there.  He seemed so at peace.  It kept his senses going and I loved every minute of it.  I wouldn't say he didn't act autistic there just that his autism blended well with the City.  It was great.  Seeing my kids like that was worth every bit of the trip.

Not long after returning we started focusing on Matthews upcoming trip to Atlanta to a Neurologist at Emory.  Since we are already going there I thought it would be great for him to be able to see a GI doctor there as well on the same day. That didn't work as planned but we could see the GI doctor sooner so we took it.  On August 10th we took off to Atlanta at 5:30 in the morning.  The experience was great.  The doctor there was amazing and seemed to share our concern for Matthew.  He ordered many test, one which requires us to go back to Atlanta tomorrow. Of course we couldn't go to Atlant without eating at the Varisty.  I sometimes question if I am going overboard with all these doctors but after Matthew waking up this morning with his stomach issues rearing its ugly head I know I am not.  I just want answers and for him to not deal with this anymore then he has to.  He is a true inspiration.  He never lets any of his issues slow him down.  It amazes me. 

Now back to how this summer helped me grow up.  I feel like I was so wrapped up with work, doctors, and life that even though I thought I was fully relieving on God but I wasn't.  I was not close to God at all.  I was doing all I could to fix my life and my families life. I was exhausted.  Seeing my kids in NYC made me realize that.  Between reading my bible, doing a bible study, our incredible Sunday school class and reading the book "blue like Jazz" I started to examine my relationship with God on a whole new level.  I scraped away all that I felt I should do or all I felt I knew about God and started seeking Him on a new level.  I realized that God isn't at all who I thought He was.  He is so complex and yet so simple at the same time.  I think I finally realize why people would give everything up just to tell others about Him.  Why so many people have died rather then deny Him.  I have no clue what is going to happen with all of us.  I am currently waiting on Matthew's doctor to call me back, and depending on the findings in Matthews test tomorrow he may have to go to Atlanta for therapy.  I could set back and worry, but what will that do.  It may be hard and it may be hectic but I fully believe God will provide all we need.  I can't wait to be able to share with others how God will see us through this crazy time in our life. 

Keeping My Mouth Shut

Before I start this blog I should say it has been in the work for some time now.  I usually just share family things or fun to read subjects, however some things have been weighing on my heart a lot here lately.  I have always believed in God, thought I had faith and went to church.  As with most things in our life we grow and learn more the older we get.  I feel that way about my faith.  I have never hidden my faith in Jesus.  There are times I am sure that God probably wishes I wasn't so vocal about it.  I haven't always lived up to what I feel shows how a true follower of Christ should be.  Living in the so called "bible belt"  I think we see that alot.  Please know that I am not trying to offend anyone, just speaking from my own experiences and beliefs, hoping to open eyes about my faith. 

Lately there has been alot on the media, mainly facebook about Christian values and standards and everyone boycotting or standing by Chick-fil-a because of there values.  While I am fairly nonconfortational and hate getting in the middle of debates, mainly religion (one of my biggest fears is to give others the wrong impression of who Christ is) I feel I need to speak up.  I am a huge believer in Christ and believe the Bible to be true.  My dad once told me if someone says something about God and can't show you where they got in from in the Bible then don't listen.  With that being said I will never treat someone different for not agreeing with me.  Faith is very personal  and I have been through alot getting to where I am with my relationship with God and I have so much farther to go.  I do my best to follow the teachings of Jesus and He truly loved everyone, He also called us to be more like Him.  All I want to say to those wanting to boycott Chick-fil-a is why do you want everyone to agree with you and to accept everyone yet you don't want to accept me, my family, and my friends for who we are.  It is a double standard.  It hurts that I do my best not to pass judgement on others, to live my faith and show love to EVERYONE regardless if I agree with the way they live but I am not accepted because of my faith.  It is sad.  We want everyone to be tolerant, but you can't pick who you want to be tolerant of.  What I mean is true tolerence will only come when we are all accepted.  I stand by my faith and it's teachings, I will never judge someone who doesn't.  Of course in my life I would love to have everyone have a true relationship with Jesus Christ but faith is personal.  Trust me it's hard to stand out there when the world doesn't see it your way. 

For those of my friends who don't like religion or feel I am being close minded or what ever, please hold off judgement until you know me.  Don't judge all Christians by a few.  Just like you ask me to accept everyone please include me in that as well.  I have no hatred in my heart, just different standards and beliefs.  Remember that everyone who says they are a Christian might not have a true relationship with Jesus, I know, I have been one.  And to all my Christian friends remember who you are representing when you speak, act and do anything.  Sorry to be so deep on this one.  I just needed to vent I guess.

A GLIPSE OF WHAT COULD BE

Well our family vacation is over and we are back home.  I had a lot of time to reflect while we drove our 13 hour trip home.  We had a blast.  I will post pictures soon,  that is as soon as I can locate my cord to the camera.  If I had to say what I liked the most it would be hard to say.  Of course I loved the city, and I don't have enough time to explain how much I loved Central Park, but I think what I enjoyed the most is the area we stayed.  We didn't stay in Manhattan, we stayed in Woodside which was somewhat residential.  I loved the small family shops, deli and coffee shops.  Just a few stops over was Sunnyside where we made daily stops for Sweet tea from McDonald's and walked the nearby shops.  I loved the markets where we bought fresh fruit and could buy all kinds of fresh food and breads.  It was wonderful.  Our daily diet consisted of pizza and my personal favorite chicken and rice from a cart located under the subway  stop. 

I enjoyed not driving, but wow we sure did walk alot.  I think at one point we walked a mile from the Central park zoo to the Museum.  Of course we took time to stop and sit on the giant rocks in the park.  Matthew really enjoyed it.  He and Patrick played some football while Cheredith and I laid in the grass.  We had so much fun.  Central Park Zoo was amazing.  I loved how all the animals there where so interactive with the people.  It amazed me.  The only disappointment there was that it was to hot for the polar bear.  I really wanted to see it. 

I loved walking the city.  It was amazing to see so many sights.  The Chelsea market was wonderful and I could have spend all day there.  It was filled with so many different things from food, clothes, and art.  Also Union Square was amazing.  Fresh fruits, veggies and cheese.  Also it was located by a Whole Food Market, which I loved and would shop there ALL  the time if I lived there.  Great quality food and good prices.  We also took the Staten Island Ferry witch was a great way to see the Statue of Liberty and the skyline of NYC.  We spent some time in Brooklyn and it was beautiful.  I was humbled to walk by the new Freedom Tower and walk by the sights that where changed forever on September 11th.  I was so humbled.  The emotion there and at the Pentagon are still so raw and open.  Every night you could see the Freedom Tower glowing in the night skyline from our hotel room.  It was a beautiful reminder of how strong the City is and how strong of a country we are. 

I think of all the things that I experienced seeing my two kids who, seem to struggle some days with everyday life be, well, kids.  I'm not sure really how else to explain it.  Anyone that spends much time with us has seen the ridged schedule we keep.  No matter where we are Matthews need for order, structure and rules dictates our life's.  I see it more on some days then others but his autism stands out alot.  I saw not Matthew my son with High Functioning Autism, but I saw Matthew my carefree son.  It still brings tears to my eyes to have been blessed with a few days with such a carefree spirit.  Full of adventure and jokes.  Even his language was different.  I miss that side of him.  I am afraid that side of my son stayed in the city.  I thank God for giving me a chance to visit with him.  Who knows maybe we can get him back here.  He played ninja while waiting on the subway, we was independent and carefree.  A leader and taking in all the knowledge that the city could give. 

Most conversations that Cheredith and I had consisted of how she wants to move there and attend NYU.  I know that she loves to dance, cheer and have fun with friends but I have never seen her light up like she does when she talks about her future.  She has already contacted Autism Speaks in NYC to see what kind of education she needs to go into the field to help those who have Autism.  She loved what she saw of NYU's campus and I can't blame her.  It was great to see her smile so much.

Of course Patrick was happy, he was home.  He fit in with all the locals, even having tourist asking him where to go and what subway to take.  After countless stores and who knows how many miles walking we finally found his favorite drink, Dr. Browns black cherry soda on our last night there.  I loved seeing him so at peace.  Overall this was a great trip that has blessed me and my family with so much.  I came back with glimpses of who they are and I much better understanding of God and his love.  I was constantly thinking of how he has brought my family through so much and even when you don't know you need it He gives just what you needed the most, HOPE.

FAMILY ADVENTURES

Schools out, and vacation is upon us.  Any one who knows our family knows that adventures follow us.  I always joke that we haven't been arrested or thrown out of a place yet.  Well 3 days and 9 states later we are still holding on.  We left out Tuesday for our trip to the Big Apple.  We stopped in Virginia to spent the night. Our room was nice and the kids enjoyed the pool.  It was early to bed that night.  We woke up real early, ate breakfast and hit the road.  First stop was Washington D.C.   We stopped to visit the September 11th memorial at the Pentagon.  I was truly humbled by what I saw.  It is so beautiful and the design is so amazing.  So much went in to it,  I recommend it to any one visiting the DC area. The plan was to see all the wonder sights around the area but our GPS had other plans.  After circling all the sites several times we decided as a family to hit the road and head to Baltimore, MD.  It was beautiful and HOT.  The kids enjoyed cupcakes at Charm City cupcakes and they where wonderful.  After buying popcorn for the road we headed to our stop for the night, Philly.

In Philly we walked everywhere and it seemed like everything there closed really early.  We did however get to see the actual Liberty Bell.  This was yet another humbling experience.  So many people where there, many from other countries and didn't speak English.  With so many differences we had all come together for the same common purpose.  To see a part of American history that showed a symbol of our freedom.  By then we were so hungry.  We happened to stumble upon a literal hole in the wall.  It was so good though.  With full stomachs we headed in for the night.  After more swim time it was bed time. 

Today we headed in to NYC.  The kids are having a blast and love it here.  Cheredith is ready to move and now wants to study medicine at NYU.  I'll post pics soon and update more on our NYC adventures.